


The Beast Within 3/?

by iantosgal (orphan_account)



Series: The Beast Within [3]
Category: Torchwood
Genre: Alternate Timelines, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-03-13
Updated: 2013-03-13
Packaged: 2017-12-05 05:28:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,605
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/719393
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/iantosgal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jack is back from his time with the Doctor and his team are keeping something from him, but what? Set after KKBB.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Beast Within 3/?

**Author's Note:**

> This was originally a story I posted a couple of years back on my LJ. My Torchwood muse buggered off and the story died. A couple of days ago, I found it, re-read it and the muse was reawakened!! So I've written a couple more chapters and just wanted to repost this over here on my new profile! So sorry for the spam of chapters, if anyone remembers it from LJ then I'm sorry for the long wait and for anyone that reads, I hope you enjoy it!!!

Ianto woke up curled up under a duvet. He moaned as he tried to sit up, his muscles protesting slightly at every movement. 

“Morning sunshine.” Owen’s voice seeped through the mugginess in his head.  
Ianto grunted in reply. 

“How you feeling?” 

“Tired.” Ianto mumbled. He finally heaved himself up and leaned over to grab the underwear Owen was holding out. Owen turned away obediently as Ianto made himself decent. 

“I remember it all.” Ianto told him happily. “I was totally in control.”

“Yeah, you did good. Do you remember Jack?

Ianto froze.

“Jack?” 

Owen turned around, relieved that Ianto had made it into his trousers.

“Jack came back. He found us and saw you change.” 

Ianto flopped down on the bed.

“I’m not surprised you didn’t notice, it was just as the change was taking place. You were to focussed on trying to remain in control and the pain and all that.” Owen sat down beside his friend. “He knows everything. Tosh and Gwen explained it to him last night.” He added gently.

“How’d he take it?”

“I haven’t seen him.” Owen confessed. 

“He’s freaking out. I know it. Shit.”

“Look, just give him some time. We’ve had loads of time to get used to this. He hasn’t.” 

“All due respect to Jack but this is hardly an inconvenience to him. Probably means that he’ll stay clear of me now.”

“No. No, I don’t think so. He was really upset, Yan. He hated seeing you like that. I think he’s falling for you, mate.”

Ianto snorted. 

“Look, just let him take it all in, yeah?”

Ianto sighed and nodded. Owen was right.

* * * * * 

Ianto didn’t see Jack for nearly the entire day. He seemed to have locked himself in his office ‘catching up on the paperwork’. Ianto thought it more probable that he was just avoiding him.

He was tapping his pen on the desk, staring blankly into space when he felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned and came face to face with Jack.

“We need to talk.”

* * * * * 

Ianto sat opposite Jack in Jack’s office. He looked at Jack’s face, trying to understand how he was feeling, but his face was impossible to read. 

“Jack...”

“No. Let me start.” Jack took a deep breath. “I’ve just come back from the worst year of my life. It was only four months here, but to me it was a lot longer. The only thing that kept me going was the thought of coming home to you, making a go of it.”

“And you don’t want that now.”

“No, that’s not what I’m saying.” Ianto was surprised to see a tear roll out of Jack’s eye. 

“I thought that you guys would be ok. My team, would be fine, unchanged, undamaged. I didn’t think for a moment that you could have suffered as I have. But I was so wrong.” The tears were flowing freely now. Ianto wanted nothing more than to pull Jack into his arms, but he didn’t. Jack needed to speak and Ianto let him. 

“You’ve been through so much and I should have been here but I wasn’t. What you guys have achieved, what you have achieved, is amazing and I am so proud of you. But I just want to tell you that there is no way Torchwood is using you as a weapon.”

“What?” Said Ianto with a frown.

“Tosh said that you wanted to us your…ability as a weapon.”

“So what if I do?”

Jack shook his head and sighed, brushing his tears away.

“There is no way I am allowing that.”

“Since when was it your decision to make.”

Jack gave him a hard stare.

“I am still the leader of Torchwood.”

“Are you? Anyway that’s beside the point. I can do with this what I want.”

“No, you can’t. I am ordering you not to use your ability as a weapon.”

“Fuck you.”

Jack flinched slightly, taken aback by the venom in Ianto’s voice. 

“What do you expect of me? To never turn? It’s not that simple Jack.”

“I know you can control it. All I’m asking is that you control it. Especially out in the field.”

“Jack, do you think this is easy? I have to live with this…this thing trying to control me and everytime I succeeded it feels like I regain just a little bit more of myself. It’s taken over my life, Jack. And if I can use it, to save people then suddenly I don’t feel so…so…lost? I dunno how I feel but I don’t feel like me.” Ianto was trying desperately not to cry. He had coped so well this far, never crying in front of the others, but as usual Captain Jack Harkness had broken his defences. His voice chocked slightly as he spoke. ”And it hurts Jack. It hurts more than you can imagine. I don’t want to live like that. If this is part of me now, then it can damn well be useful.”

“You will put yourself in unnecessary danger. I’m not asking you never to turn, hell right now I don’t care. Just promise me, that you wont put yourself in danger all the time because you think you can handle it better, because you think your stronger.”

“I am stronger. If I turn I can protect the others. Owen, Tosh, Gwen, it’s worth it Jack.”

“Ianto…”

“It’s my life this is ruining Jack. Not yours.” Ianto got up and left. He didn’t even know why he was so angry. Maybe it was because they had dealt with this for so long without Jack and now Jack was back, trying to run the show again. But Ianto was in charge of himself. He would deal with this in his own way. Jack could go to hell.

* * * * *

Tosh watched as Ianto stormed out of Jack’s office, down the stairs and towards the archives. Once she was sure he was gone she made her way to Jack’s office. She tapped lightly on the door frame, looking over at Jack, his head in his arms on the desk. He looked up, hastily try to wipe his tears away.

“Ok?” She asked.

Jack nodded and then changed the movement into a shake his face crumpling. Tosh rushed forward and pulled him into a reassuring hug.

“Hey. Shhh. It’s ok.” She whispered.

“No, no it’s not, I’ve ruined everything. Ianto think that I‘m more concerned with how this effect me than him.”

“No he doesn’t.”

“Yeah, he does. I said it all wrong. I just, I don’t want to lose him. He scares me because I can see it in his eyes. Recklessness, but more than that. He want’s everyone so much that he doesn’t care what happens to him. And now I’ve just made him mad at me.”

“This will all blow over. He’s going to realise that you only want the best for him. The last month’s have been hard for him.”

“I know.” Jack wiped his eyes and gave Tosh a quick peck on the cheek.

* * * * * 

Owen followed Ianto down to the archives where he found Ianto leaning on the wall breathing heavily. He rushed forwards, recognising the symptoms. 

“You alright?”

“Yeah.” Ianto replied through gritted teeth. “Just give me a minute.”

Owen waited patiently as his friend pushed down the anger welling up inside of him. Ianto was quicker to anger these days and even though he was getting better at keeping it down, sometimes it still got the better of him.

Ianto sighed and pushed away from the wall.

“I’m ok.” He muttered. “Can’t believe I let him get to me.” He continued, shaking his head. Owen clapped a hand round his shoulders and shook him slightly.

“Look Yan. I know he’s not taking this so well.” Ianto snorted, he clearly thought that was an understatement. “But he really cares about ya and he just needs some time.”

“Time! Why is everyone saying that? We didn’t get time did we! I had no time to get used to this I just had to get on with it. This is happening to me not him so why the fuck should he get special consideration.” Ianto voice was getting louder and louder.

“Ianto, calm down.” Owen said, trying to keep the situation under control.

“Why the fuck should I? He left us Owen.” Ianto punched the wall, his fist breaking easily through the hard surface making Owen jump. “He left me. And what? I’m just supposed to forgive him just like that.” He punched the wall again and Owen grabbed him, spinning him away from the wall. He put his hands on Ianto’s shoulders and looked into his eyes.

“Hey, hey! Deep breaths ok? Come on Ianto, don’t do this to yourself. Yeah, he left but he came back. He came back for you.” Ianto rolled his eyes. “We all know it. We didn’t have time, no, but we all went though it together. We’ve helped each other through this but he has no one. We’re already there, dealing with this. We have our routines, our protocols and he’s playing catch up. So yeah he needs time, but he will get used to this just as we have.”

Ianto took deep breaths and felt his anger ebb away.

“What’s this really about, Yan? Jack’s reaction to our furry friend?” Ianto couldn’t help but smile at the now familiar nickname. “Or the fact that he left?”

Ianto sighed and rubbed a hand tiredly over his face.

“I don’t know. Both?”

“You need to talk to him. Get things sorted because you can’t go on like this.”


End file.
